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Inspiration, not really!
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English Poetry |
incessant rain on my rooftop
a mess of mixed sentiments
crowd of old photos scattered
body broken into asymmetrical fragments
i cannot get myself to stand straight
the rain outside seems to be a pathetic fallacy
disinterestedly pouring down in segments
each drop of rain forming a world on my forehead
i have finally had enough
Strengthening my fibers I sum up my last ounce of energy
to say
“Stop the world, I WANT to get off!”
A beautiful poem,Arshad.
Nice poem Yashad
Yashad,
this poem really held my attention.
The use of the words asymmetrical and segments I found interesting in the use of the imagery in theses lines. They seem to re-focus the mind.
The closing lines hint at “the end of one’s rope”. A strong ending.
“body broken into asymmetrical fragments”
………..
“disinterestedly pouring down in segments”
@Gion Gion,
Similar thoughts.
Some thoughts about the semantics:
The absence of punctuation between lines is fine, since each denotes separate phrases except the penultimate line:
Strengthening my fibers, I sum up my last ounce of energy,
to say
Poems are meant to be read. What a reader reads should echo how the author would and that’s not possible without punctuation. The rhythm, the pace and the tone is clearer if we just punctuate our poems. Again, this is just a point of view and you may absolutely differ!
WOW.